What Identity Are You Speaking Into Your Church?

Choose your words carefully.

Your words are immensely powerful. A destructive word can be devastating. A constructive word can change a life.

The Bible says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” (Proverbs 18:21 ESV)

Because of this, I take the words I say very seriously. I want my words to bring life, not death. This is especially true with my kids.

I want to instill specific, positive values in my kids. So I came up with a few simple phrases that I repeat every time a situation arises where I can reinforce that value. I use these phrases and opportunities to build a healthy identity into their lives.

Here are a few examples of things I tell them:

We are Hilgemanns. Hilgemanns never quit.
We follow Jesus. We love everyone, even when they are bad.
We are Christians. We always tell the truth.

They are nothing special. But if my kids understand the values of perseverance, loving their neighbor, and honesty, we all win. This is especially true if they tie it into their identity as a family of Christ followers.

It is a simple idea, but it’s working.

The other day I got really frustrated with something I was doing. So I threw my hands up, let out a sigh, and said, “I’m done with this. I quit!”

Little did I know that my 5-year-old daughter was listening to me. She immediately responded, “You can’t quit Daddy. We are Hilgemanns. We never quit!”

Bingo. My words are working. The idea of being a family who never gives up stuck with my daughter so much that she won’t allow me to fall short. My words are building life, even when I fail.

This got me thinking, What if we did the same thing in our churches? What if we speak words that build an identity into our people?

What if we had values we constantly repeated about how people from our church live? This is different from just having a core value that you paste onto a website or bulletin. I’m talking about simple, repetitive sayings that come direct from stage every time you address a specific value.

Maybe every time you talk about generosity, you have a saying like, “Here at xyz church we are generous people, because God gives generously to us.”

Maybe every time you talk about evangelism, you say something like, “At xyz church, we are not afraid to take a small risk to make a big ask.”

Maybe every time you talk about leaving a legacy, you say something like, “At xyz church we sacrifice now so that later our children will become better followers of Jesus than we are.”

These are just a few examples. Hopefully, you get the point.

Even if it isn’t true of your church yet, what if this spoken identity began to build a new life into your church’s culture?

How might your church change? What if your people started getting it? What if they actually lived out these values?

Try it out. I am.

If you have kids, try it with them too. My kids are young, so only time will tell if it sticks into their teen and adult years. But, for now, it works.

Just one word of warning: If you start doing this, you had better live the values yourself. If not, like my daughter did to me, your people will call you out.