Before You Practice Preaching, Practice What You Preach
The longer I am in ministry, the more I see it.
It seems like every week I hear about another pastor’s moral failure that scars the church and murders their ministry.
Whether it’s an affair, drugs, porn addiction, or mishandling money, these hidden sins are ripping churches apart and leaving good people feeling betrayed and disillusioned.
Before we get into the practical tips on how to preach, we have to start here.
Integrity. Character. Self-control. Discipline.
Before you practice preaching, you had better practice what you preach.
“For they preach, but do not practice.”
– Jesus, Matthew 23:3 (ESV)
The stakes have never been higher. Trust has never been more difficult for pastors to earn.
The title of pastor no longer holds respect in the eyes of most people outside the church but skepticism.
This is not something to be taken lightly!
Who you are is more important than what you say. (Only 1/3 of preaching is the words you say anyways.)
The Standard for Pastoral Living
“Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness.”
– James 3:1 (ESV)
Becoming a pastor doesn’t mean that suddenly sin no longer affects us. In fact, the Devil will do absolutely everything in his power to trip you up even more.
If every time a new convert is added to the kingdom angels rejoice, you better believe there is a party in hell at the fall of every pastor.
Pastors, this is no joke. This is war!
There are many passages in the Bible we could pull to reference how pastors should live. Obviously, a pastor must do their absolute best to follow all the commands in scripture, but nobody is perfect.
So what should the standard for a pastor’s life be to be eligible for ministry?
The golden standard is 1 Timothy 3:1-7. Paul lays out the standards for being an “overseer” or elder in the church. These saying not only apply to elders as we see them in churches today, but all those in church leadership.
1 The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. 2 Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5 for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church? 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.
– 1 Timothy 3:1-7 (ESV)
Let’s break it down.
“a Noble task”
The life of a pastor is hard. It is a task. It is work. It won’t be easy. Wimps need not apply.
You will struggle. You will suffer. You will be tested. You will be broken. You will doubt your calling. But it is worth it!
This is a noble task. A holy calling.
Are you prepared for the task ahead?
Be “above reproach”
This is the catch-all qualification. You must not even allow people to have a hint of doubt about your integrity. Steer clear of anything that could even be perceived as wrong.
My favorite example of a man who was above reproach is Billy Graham. He would never be alone with a woman. He took this so seriously that when he was in an elevator and a woman walked in, he would exit and catch the next one. And he never traveled alone. Billy Graham knew the importance of not even allowing a hint of doubt about his ministry’s integrity.
Is there anything in your life that could raise a hint of doubt?
Be “the husband of one wife”
Obviously, no polygamy allowed. But this goes deeper than that. You better be faithful to your wife. Love her. Treat her the way she deserves to be treated. No adultery in your heart. No flirting with other women. No pornography.
An eroding marriage almost always precedes the erosion of a pastor’s integrity.
Are you a one-woman man?
Be “sober-minded”
You must be someone who thinks clearly. Someone who is not easily guided by pure emotions or irrational thought.
Can you keep your head in difficult situations to make the tough calls that need to be made?
Be “self-controlled”
Everyone struggles in different areas. For example, it is easy for me to practice self-control about stealing. It’s just never been a problem for me. But don’t talk to me about being self-controlled about eating. I have never met a cheeseburger I didn’t like.
Regardless of what area of your life is hardest for you, a pastor needs to be self-controlled. You need to be able to recognize the areas you struggle in and have the determination and discipline to moderate it. We cannot preach self-control to our people if it is not evident in our own lives first.
Be “respectable”
Are people able to respect you? The second you lose respect, your ministry is over. The way you live your life should be to the highest standard. Even if people don’t follow your every example they should at least respect you.
It takes years to earn respect, but only one poor decision, emotional outburst, or moral slip for people to say, “I have lost all respect for him.”
Be “hospitable”
Do you welcome people into your home? Do you share meals with friends, family, and neighbors? Are you friendly? Do you seek to serve people or be served?
Pastors should follow Jesus’ example of sharing meals and washing his disciples feet. Hospitality is not just a gift, it is a requirement for being a leader.
Be “able to teach”
This is the first and only area of gifting or talent required. Can you teach? Are you able? Do you know the Bible well enough to teach others? This doesn’t mean you are the primary preacher or teacher, but are you able if called upon?
There are some well-meaning men who have no right to ever preach and teach simply because they are not good at it. They are gifted to serve the church in other ways.
Teaching is a gift, but it is still a skill that can be learned and developed. There has to be some natural ability, but it is almost always raw – a lump of coal waiting for the diamond to be formed.
How do you know you are gifted? You feel it in yourself, you know deep down that you have it in you, but it is also affirmed by others (Note: your mom doesn’t count).
I have never met a pastor whose first sermon was their best. That is why I started Pro Preacher. This website exists to help pastors form and refine their teaching abilities.
Be “not a drunkard”
I may get some pushback on this, but contrary to what some Christian circles believe, this doesn’t say you cannot ever have a drink. It says don’t be a drunk.
If a pastor wants to go to a bar and have a drink with a friend or a glass of wine with his wife, that is up to their discretion. (Notice I didn’t say 5 beers, but a drink.) After all, Jesus was accused of drinking with sinners.
An occasional drink is not grounds for being disqualified from ministry. However, if alcohol is a problem for you – you drink to get drunk, numb the pain, or you can’t go a week without it – get help.
Be “not violent but gentle”
A pastor should not be getting into bar fights. He should not have restraining orders or assault charges. But this also goes deeper than physical violence.
Do you threaten and yell at the refs at your son’s baseball games? Do you get bad road rage? Do you verbally abuse your wife or kids? When you are mad do you slam doors, and hit things?
Be “not quarrelsome”
There are many pastors who love a good debate. Healthy debate is not a problem, but are you always stirring up arguments? Do you ever compromise? Do you find yourself arguing a lot with staff members? Church members? Your wife? Your kids?
There are proper times for a good healthy argument, but if heated arguments are a daily occurrence, you need to examine your heart.
Be “not a lover of money”
You didn’t really get into ministry for the money did you? So why is it a problem now? Why do so many pastors get in trouble for pocketing the churches money or mishandling finances?
I’m sure most of us pastors have been there where money is tight, your salary is low, the mortgage needs to be paid, and you start to get bitter towards the church for not helping provide for your family. Beware!
Put systems in place to keep you accountable with the money. Don’t manage it alone. Better yet, never touch it. The love of money is the root of all evil. (1 Timothy 6:10)
“Manage” your “household well”
A pastor needs to manage his home before he manages his church. If you cannot lead your family, how can you lead the church?
This is hard. Sometimes older children make bad choices regardless of how much you loved them and taught them good from evil. Sometimes a spouse does something completely independent of you.
But this mandate remains the same. A pastor needs to have his family in order before he is able to lead the church. It goes back to loving and serving your wife and spending real, quality time with her and your children (not checked out on your phone/computer/TV).
If you sacrifice your family in the name of ministry you will lose both your family and your ministry! Be a good husband and a good dad long before ever trying to be a good pastor.
Be “not a recent convert”
A pastor should be spiritually mature. Someone who just gave their life to Christ last weekend is not qualified to lead a church. They just aren’t. If a young Christian is thrust into leadership too soon, they will fail or grow prideful.
There should be evidence of spiritual maturity in your life. Do you pray daily? Do you consistently attend church? Do you read your Bible consistently? Do you confess your sin? Do you lead others to Christ?
A pastor should live like a pastor for many years before ever receiving the official title.
Be “well though of by outsiders”
What do people outside the church think about you? Do they respect you? Do they even like you?
Do they feel loved by you? Do they feel served by you? Do they know that you care?
Even if they completely disagree with your beliefs, do they still hold you in high regard for your conviction and integrity?
Are your neighbors glad you moved into the neighborhood?
Your reputation in the community will always affect your impact in ministry.
A Call to Arms
One of the pastors I respect most is not flashy. He does not pastor a large church. You will never see his name on the cover of a book or the speaker at a conference.
But he has been a model of character and integrity in ministry for over 30 years. He is well thought of in his community, respected by his church, and loved by his family.
Over decades his church has faithfully changed the lives of thousands of people, including mine.
I hope we can all strive for such a life in ministry.
It is time we make war with sin!
Guard your heart, guard your family, guard your ministry from even a hint of anything that could cause a problem.
Let’s end this trend of pastors disqualifying themselves from ministry!
Your life speaks louder than words.
Before you ever practice preaching, practice what you preach.
“Before you practice preaching, practice what you preach” is part of the Preaching 101 Series. More from this series:
- Preaching 101 – Back to Basics
- What Does the Bible Say About Preaching?
- Before You Practice Preaching, Practice What You Preach
- How to Write a Sermon – 7 Steps to a Memorable Message (Step 1)
- How to Write a Sermon – 7 Steps to a Memorable Message (Step 2)
- How to Write a Sermon – 7 Steps to a Memorable Message (Step 3)
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I think the `one wife` message goes even deeper – one wife in who’s eyes? The law’s? Or God’s? If you’ve been unjustly divorced, and have remarried, I think this applies equally.